Letter to President Barney

June 24, 2019 Dear President Barney, I have been reflecting the past few weeks on what to write to you in this letter. I wish words could describe all of the emotions I have right now, but they just can't. Neither can they describe the past 18 months of my life. I will sure try my best.  I would first like to express my gratitude for you and Sister Barney. You have truly become my parents here in Minnesota. Thank you for always being so loving to me and for teaching me how to appropriately pronounce my last name! I appreciate the countless hours you took to meet with me, give me blessings, and email me every week. Many of the emails you sent to the mission each week I forwarded to my family at home. I know they have loved them just as much as I have. I am forever grateful that I was able to have you and Sister Barney as my mission presidents throughout my whole mission. I love you both. My mission would not have been the same if it wasn't for all the missionaries I was able to serve with and around. I know I was supposed to have each one of my companions for a reason; I have learned so much from them. Every one of them has helped me grow in one way or another. I am also grateful for the many opportunities I had to work with the sisters in my zones. They are wonderful missionaries. Many of them come from difficult backgrounds, and it's taught me that anyone can serve a mission! There is a mission for everyone. I am grateful for all the Elders I was able to serve around. Many of them taught me what I may or may not want my future, eternal companion, haha. I truly love the missionaries in this mission. I hope to remain in contact with many of them. On my mission I have learned "bastante," meaning, a lot. My eyes have been opened to the Spanish culture. At the beginning of my mission, I honestly was not sure how I would be able to relate to them. I couldn't even speak their language! But through prayer and hard work, I was finally able to connect. I have been humbled through working with them. Many of them don't have much, but they come here for a better life for their children. One lady in particular, Flor, has made a forever impact on my life. Flor has 4 children, all between the ages of 12 to 18. She was a stay-at-home mom in Mexico while her husband worked and her children went to school. Unexpectedly, her husband passed away, leaving her with 4 kids, no husband, and no job. She decided to move to the United States for a better life. They have been living here for just about 3 years now. Flor works 2 jobs; one in a factory and another at a restaurant, and she takes English classes in the late evenings. She is truly an example of many of the people I have encountered throughout my mission. It's so humbling. I hope that when I am a mother, I will remember Flor and her sacrifice for her children. How blessed am I. Besides all the delicious Mexican food I have also eaten on my mission, I am grateful that I was able to learn about the cultures, traditions, and language of the Hispanic people. They are very kind, generous, and hard working. Almost all of them are religious and have beliefs in God. I have learned how I can have more faith in Him through their examples.  One of the biggest things I have learned from my mission is the concept of love. I have been able to feel a small bit of the love that my Heavenly Father has for every single one of His children. I have been able to feel more of the love He has for me. When I got to the MTC in Mexico, I felt so broken down. I felt as if I had lost everything (which in a way I sort of did). I had a very difficult time. But it was then that I was able to feel Heavenly Father's love for me. I know He was there helping me, and I know I needed to feel like that so I would be able to rely on Him more than I had ever needed to before in my life. He has been here throughout my entire mission pushing me on and encouraging me, just like how my earthly father would. I have felt the importance of always being worthy to have the Holy Ghost. When my companion and I didn't know what street or apartment building to knock, or who we should go visit, or what we should teach to a less-active family, the Holy Ghost has been there as a guide. I think it's so cool how the very first point in the message of the Restoration is that God is our loving Heavenly Father. The first thing! How comforting it is to know that God loves you, me, and all of His children.  Another thing I have really learned from my mission is the power of the Book of Mormon. Wow. What an incredible record it is. Being able to dive myself into it, testify of it, and apply it to my life daily has been life-changing for me. I love sharing my testimony of it to others. I'm not sure how many times people tried to test my knowledge of the Book of Mormon and "bash" with my companions and I, but from each of those experiences my testimony has just grown stronger and stronger from it. I love the quote from Preach My Gospel when it says, "The enemies of the Church understand this clearly. This is why they go to such great lengths to try to disprove the Book of Mormon, for if it can be discredited, the Prophet Joseph Smith goes with it." It is so true. Some of the most spiritual experiences I have had on my mission are those when we were able to share the First Vision. It's powerful how strong you can feel the spirit when quoting Joseph Smith's words. A few weeks ago I told you the story of a man who was not being very nice to us about the church. Well, I felt prompted to just state the First Vision. When I finished, this man could not speak. He tried, but no words came out of his mouth. I know the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet. I am grateful that I had so many opportunities to come to know of it's truthfulness.  It is a little hard to see how I have personally changed throughout my mission. I still think I am the same in many aspects; my personality, my interests, some of my characteristics. But I have noticed a change in what I think is most important in life. Is getting 100 likes on my Facebook post important to me anymore? Nah, not really. Is caring so much about what others think of me as important as it was before? Nope. Having 18 months to not focus on myself was a bit hard at first, but ultimately, I found a lot more joy in focusing on the lives of others around me. I care more about other people. I have come to know for myself how important church attendance, prayer, and daily scripture study is. Through Safeguards, I have learned how to use technology wisely. Rather than scroll on social media for hours, I know that there are better uses with my time. Having weekly device audits where your companion looks at everything has helped me stay accountable and to make sure I'm always doing what I should be. These are a few things that I have noticed changed about myself. I pray that I won't ever revert back to my own ways; that I will follow my goals in My Plan and keep moving forward. Serving a mission has made me a lot more grateful for the things I have been blessed with. My family would have to be number one. I never realized how much my mom and dad did for me until I wasn't with them. Seeing so many dysfunctional families on my mission, I know that all of them would be stronger and things would work together much more smoothly if they followed the principles of the gospel. I have seen the importance of having the gospel as the foundation in the family unit. My family is an example of that, of which I will be forever grateful for. I am grateful for my Savior, Jesus Christ. Because of Him I am here. He is the reason I decided to stay on my mission. He is the one who has helped me along this journey. I will forever be indebted unto Him. I love Him. Through His sacrifice, everything He suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane, I will live with Him again. Alma 7 has to be one of the greatest chapter in all the Book of Mormon. I have relied on it many times. Verse 11 and 12 in particular stand out to me. At the end of verse 12, it says "That He may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." "Succor" means to run to. I have felt Him run to me. I am so grateful for Him. How lucky am I to be a part of His sacred work.  I just can't find words to express to you the feelings of my heart about my mission. To say "I love my mission," is not sufficient enough. But in all honesty, I love my mission. I really do. No, it was not easy, but I knew that going into it. I would not have traded it for anything in the world.  I share my testimony that this is the true church of Jesus Christ restored on the earth today with living prophets to guide us. I know He lives. I know He watches over us. I am very nervous to go home. I'm not sure what it will be like. But I know that my mission has prepared me for my future. I look forward to the things I have ahead.  In the name of Jesus Christ, amen. Love Hermana Nissinen  P.S. let me know again when you and Sister Barney are going to Finland!